Being Childfree has soo many perks! Most of the Childfree Besties will mention freedom, time to themselves or their spouses, clean homes, extra sleep, and extra spending money as the main benefits. I agree with all of those, but for me, the biggest benefit is the time I get to spend with my parents. I grew up with both my parents. We were a close-knit family, and I was well loved by them both. Of course, as a teen and young adult, my parents were not my favorite people to be around (all those “stupid” rules). In my mind, they were getting in my way of me spreading my little ignorant wings. As a woman closer to 40 than not, I now have a much deeper appreciation of my parents. We differ on several topics, and I have diverted from the plan I’m sure they envisioned for me as a child, but what can I say? I do my own thing! They have watched (likely through partially shielded eyes) as I have navigated my way around adulthood and grown into the person I am today. They don’t s
The pressure for women to have children transcends cultural, ethnic, and racial lines. Terms like legacy, fruitfulness, family unit, matriarchy, and even the opposing connotations like barrenness and the dreaded patriarchy are easily understood in every culture. The translation and application may be different, but the message is clear: Women should have children to progress humanity. Even with discussions about overpopulation, poverty, and cultural conflicts, women are still expected to gratefully accept some man’s sperm into her body and produce at least one baby. Depending on your living situation, a child represents your life insurance policy, estate planning, and your retirement plan. As a Black woman, I have no doubt felt the pressure to have children. Whether it is because I should promote my culture and pass along traditions and history or because I should be afraid of dying alone, children are expected. Over the years, I have gone back and forth on the desire to have childre